DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife and I enjoy riding a tandem bicycle and have done so for many years and miles, both near our home and in far-flung locations. I ride in the front as the “pilot,” and my wife is the “stoker” behind me.
As you may know, there is inevitably someone who finds it humorous to call out “She’s not pedaling!” as we pass by, quite often as we are taking on challenging terrain.
Having encountered this phenomenon too many times to count, neither of us finds it within ourselves to share in the amusement. On the contrary, as my wife takes her role in our team effort seriously and is quite fit, we both struggle to avoid succumbing to irritation.
Each of us, in turn, has attempted responses in friendly jest, with some success. But other times, we find ourselves caught dumbstruck. I wonder if Miss Manners might suggest a polite way to maintain a friendly, casual exchange while being clear that we respect each person’s effort and dedication to an activity that we truly enjoy?
GENTLE READER: Smile and wave, as if responding to an entirely different comment such as, “Well done!” The caller will be perplexed or frustrated and assume you misheard, but by then, Miss Manners trusts, you will have passed them.
Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
